CBS’s Stephen Colbert used the Tuesday edition of The Late Show to launch into an extended factually-challenged diatribe against Texas Governor Greg Abbott’s border policies.
The hysteria started immediately, “Now, right now that border bill, it's kind of important because-- and I don't want to alarm anyone-- we're on the cusp of another civil war.”
Colbert then launched his attack on Abbott, “Here's what's going on. Texas, they had their own plan to deal with the border, put in place by Texas Governor Greg Abbott, seen here releasing a flock of doves to poop on migrant children.”
In order to portray Abbott as a heartless goon, Colbert got the facts of the situation on the ground wrong, “Abbott introduced an anti-immigration crackdown, putting razor wire along 60 miles of the border, but the federal government didn't like the razor wire, saying it physically prevented border patrol agents from entering the area, processing migrants, and providing assistance to drowning victims, which is why border patrol had been cutting the razor wire to reach them.”
Colbert was citing a Vox article from January 27 which is incredible because by the idea that the migrants drowned because of Texas’s actions had long since been debunked. They died before Border Patrol alerted Texas.
Continuing his attacks on Abbott, Colbert invoked the Statue of Liberty, “Now, once the feds came and started cutting the wire, Abbott sued, but he also doubled down, installing razor wire under the surface of the Rio Grande and circular saw blades between buoys. Next, he's gonna change the poem on the Statue of Liberty from ‘Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free’ to ‘Would you like to play a game?’
Next, Colbert turned his ire on Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, “The razor wire case went to the Supreme Court, who ruled against Texas in a 5-4 decision with no details or explanations provided. The dissents simply read ‘Nay, nay, nay," and ‘Does this luxury RV come in mother of pearl?’"
The reason why the dissents had no explanations is because the Court was deciding whether or not to remove an injunction prohibiting the feds from cutting the wire. The underlying case is still be litigated and despite all the hot rhetoric, Homeland Security still has not sued for access to Shelby Park.
According to Colbert, “Now, this really should have been a clear 9-0 decision against Texas. The federal government has the final say on all immigration. It's in the Constitution. It's called the Supremacy Clause and it clearly states that federal law and federal treaty obligations quote ‘Shall be the supreme law of the land.’"
Despite the underlying legal question not being answered yet, Colbert was certain Abbott was echoing some very dangerous ideas, “After the ruling, the Texas National Guard ignored the Supreme Court decision and Abbott continued construction along the border, claiming that he doesn't have to listen to the Supreme Court because the Biden administration had ‘Broken the compact between the United States and the states," a reference to an archaic idea called the ‘Compact theory and nullification.’"
While Colbert accuses Abbott of going down a dangerous road, it was actually he who was spreading dangerous hysteria about civil war because he couldn’t even bother to get the facts right.
Here is a transcript for the January 30 show:
CBS The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
1/30/2024
11:40 PM ET
STEPHEN COLBERT: Now, right now that border bill, it's kind of important because-- and I don't want to alarm anyone-- we're on the cusp of another civil war. Here's what's going on. Texas, they had their own plan to deal with the border, put in place by Texas Governor Greg Abbott, seen here releasing a flock of doves to poop on migrant children.
Abbott introduced an anti-immigration crackdown, putting razor wire along 60 miles of the border, but the federal government didn't like the razor wire, saying it physically prevented border patrol agents from entering the area, processing migrants, and providing assistance to drowning victims, which is why border patrol had been cutting the razor wire to reach them.
As a general rule, you want to be able to help people who are drowning or really in any mortal danger, not make things worse. That's why the fire safety signs don't say, "Stop, drop, and stab."
Now, once the feds came and started cutting the wire, Abbott sued, but he also doubled down, installing razor wire under the surface of the Rio Grande and circular saw blades between buoys. Next, he's gonna change the poem on the Statue of Liberty from "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free" to "Would you like to play a game?"
The razor wire case went to the Supreme Court, who ruled against Texas in a 5-4 decision with no details or explanations provided. The dissents simply read "Nay, nay, nay," and "Does this luxury RV come in mother of pearl?"
Now, this really should have been a clear 9-0 decision against Texas. The federal government has the final say on all immigration. It's in the Constitution. It's called the Supremacy Clause and it clearly states that federal law and federal treaty obligations quote "Shall be the supreme law of the land." For those of you who didn't go to law school, supreme law means it comes with sour cream. But unanimous or not, SCOTUS has spoken. It's been decided, right? Wrong. 'Cause Greg Abbott is plowing ahead.
After the ruling, the Texas National Guard ignored the Supreme Court decision and Abbott continued construction along the border, claiming that he doesn't have to listen to the Supreme Court because the Biden administration had "Broken the compact between the United States and the states," a reference to an archaic idea called the "Compact theory and nullification."
