For the Tuesday installment of The Daily Show on Comedy Central, Marlon Wayans broke out his Quan character as he interviewed former Fulton County special prosecutor Nathan Wade to ask if the affair with D.A. Fani Willis was worth ending democracy.
Wayans began by asking, “What was your first thought when you had the affair with Fani become public between you and here?”
Wade did not like the word, “I don't label it an affair. D.A. Willis is a respectable mother, a brilliant legal mind. We spent countless hours preparing this case, investigating this case—”
Since Wayans was playing a character, he never asked Wade explicitly about whether the tradeoff was worth it. Instead, he would try to make things awkward by using heavy irony and sarcasm to point out that none of Wade’s inside legal baseball talk explains the affair, “I see it all happen, countless hours, and I need a foot rub, and, you know what I mean? She rubbed your foot like ‘here, let me give you a massage’ and all of a sudden we up on this desk. Man.”
Wade did not do much to extract himself from the awkwardness, “No. Not even close. Not even close. Not even close… so during the course of the investigation we would meet early mornings, weekends, spend full days –”
Wayans pretended to understand, “How can you not hit that? How can you not? We spending that much time together, we doing everything, we might as well!”
Later in their conversation, Wade would claim it is “a common misconception. She's not my boss, she's never been my boss… I was a contract attorney, she’s more analogous to a client to me.”
That led Wayans to the following exchange, where the sexual irony appeared to fly right over Wade’s head:
WAYANS: So you say she was a client?
WADE: Yes.
WAYANS: So, you serve her well.
WADE: I did—I did my job. Let's talk about some of the successes I did while I was—
WAYANS: I think we talked about successes.
WADE: We didn't. We are talking about securing an indictment, talking about getting people to enter pleas.
WAYANS: Right, enter pleas. Enter pleas, you gotta enter pleas.
Wayans eventually got to the main point, “So let me ask you, when old girl was like ‘Hey, babe, you want to be in charge of this prosecution of the president of the United States who did this insurrection,’ did you think, like, this could get messy? Or you was like ‘no, I will be all right?’"
Wade insisted, “We did not have that type of relationship at the outset, and we were interviewing other people for the position.”
Wayans then did a couple of sex position poses on the couch to ask, “Did that position look like this? Or did that position look like this?”
Towards the end, he again asked, “So, some people saying this sort of deal might have ruined the best chance to hold Trump accountable for trying to end democracy. Now, what would you say to all the haters out there who can't get laid?”
Wade did not know why Wayans was so upset with him, “Well, I don't know what the haters are thinking, but what I will say is under my leadership, we successfully secured a valid legal indictment, the charging document.”
With all of the bitter irony he could muster, Wayans again doom-mongered about the end of democracy, “All right, young black men need a role model, what's your advice to kids in the hood that's out there that want to grow up and have big dick potentially end democracy? That's some lethal shit if you ask me.”
Wade, initially, could not control his laughter, and only after a cartoon technical difficulties interruption, did he declare, “I don’t know that I have advice for any young black men to have workplace romances. What I do have advice for young black men is simply this: you can do whatever you put your mind to.”
Apparently, that includes getting kicked off one of the most important trials in American history over ethical concerns.
Here is a transcript for the June 18 show:
Comedy Central The Daily Show
6/18/2024
11:14 PM ET
MARLON WAYANS: Here today I got my man Nathan Wade, looking smooth.
NATHAN WADE: I'll take that.
WAYANS: What was your first thought when you had the affair with Fani become public between you and here?
WADE: I don't label it an affair.
WAYANS: Wifey or?
WADE: D.A. Willis is a respectable mother, a brilliant legal mind.
WAYANS: Right.
WADE: We spent countless hours preparing this case, investigating this case—
WAYANS: I see it all happen, countless hours, and I need a foot rub, and, you know what I mean? She rubbed your foot like “here, let me give you a massage” and all of a sudden we up on this desk. Man.
WADE: No. Not even close. Not even close. Not even close.
WAYANS: She liked it at you or you liked it at her?
WADE: That's a great question, right, so during the course of the investigation we would meet early mornings, weekends, spend full days –
WAYANS: How can you not hit that? How can you not? We spending that much time together, we doing everything, we might as well!
WADE: Well, in terms of workplace romances, how many places have you worked?
WAYANS: I probably worked like three or four places and everywhere I went it was a mess. So, she your boss? You are not indecent proposal – you on that Demi-- what's that white girl's name that married to the dude from Die Hard?
WADE: So, that's a common misconception.
WAYANS: Disclosure, you on that disclosure shit.
WADE: No, that's a common misconception. She's not my boss, she's never been my boss.
WAYANS: You weren’t HeToo-ed.
WADE: Right.
WAYANS: She ain’t HeToo you?
WADE: No. I was a contract attorney, she’s more analogous to a client to me.
WAYANS: So you say she was a client?
WADE: Yes.
WAYANS: So, you serve her well.
WADE: I did—I did my job. Let's talk about some of the successes I did while I was—
WAYANS: I think we talked about successes.
WADE: We didn't. We are talking about securing an indictment, talking about getting people to enter pleas.
WAYANS: Right, enter pleas. Enter pleas, you gotta enter pleas.
WADE: Well, we’re talking about other jurisdictions even following suit.
WAYANS: So let me ask you, when old girl was like "Hey, babe, you want to be in charge of this prosecution of the president of the United States who did this insurrection,’ did you think, like, this could get messy? Or you was like "no, I will be all right?"
WADE: We did not have that type of relationship at the outset, and we were interviewing other people for the position.
WAYANS: What position was it?
WADE: It was the position of special prosecutor.
WAYANS: Did that position look like this? Or did that position look like this?
WADE: So, no.
…
WAYANS: So, some people saying this sort of deal might have ruined the best chance to hold Trump accountable for trying to end democracy. Now, what would you say to all the haters out there who can't get laid?
WADE: Well, I don't know what the haters are thinking, but what I will say is under my leadership, we successfully secured a valid legal indictment, the charging document.
WAYANS: All right, young black men need a role model, what's your advice to kids in the hood that's out there that want to grow up and have big dick potentially end democracy? That's some lethal shit if you ask me.
WADE: We’re talking about – [laughter] Cut!
[Cartoon Technical Difficulties Screen]
I don’t know that I have advice for any young black men to have workplace romances. What I do have advice for young black men is simply this: you can do whatever you put your mind to.
