Esquire magazine's resident Chekist, Matt Miller, whose official job title is Associate Culture Editor, is now engaged in a culture war against celebrities whose high crime is that they haven't joined in the liberal hate fest against Donald Trump by openly denouncing him. Not only does he condemn them generally but Miller goes so far as to list their names along with their social media following.
It doesn't matter if these celebrities are silent even though they really support Hillary or they are just apolitical or if they secretly support Trump but don't want to alienate a portion of their fan base. To Miller it is an outright Thought Crime if they don't loudly become as openly psychotic over Trump as he is.
We now join Miller as he reveals just how over the top unhinged he is on not only hating Trump but even hating those who don't share his hangups on this matter:
A shockingly large number of Americans are prepared to make a reality TV star the ruler of the free world. Celebrities literally have the attention of millions of adoring fans at their fingertips, and it's hard to deny these people's influence. Yes, they've made a name for themselves doing, in most cases, everything other than politics, but so has Donald Trump!
...Any celebrity who has ever championed a cause, written, or wrote, or performed any work of any actual substance relating to life in this country has something at stake here. Maybe these artists are protecting their brand? F--- that! If their brand means to sacrifice the very values that make them human and a contributing member of this society, then they live a sad, hollow life. These are some of the highest paid and most influential celebrities on the planet who have yet to publicly and clearly declare allegiance to either candidate.
And now Miller produces his list of celebrities guilty of not outright condemning Trump:
Taylor Swift
Total social media followers: 156,147,879
Past affiliation? Unknown.
GUILTY!
Sean "P. Diddy" Combs
Total social media followers: 16,265,085
Past affiliation? Initially supported Trump (!?) then backtracked and said he was undecided.
GASP! If you had supported Trump in the past you are forever...GUILTY!
Garth Brooks
Total social media followers: 2,281,992
That cowboy hat alone makes him...GUILTY!
Miranda Lambert
Total social media followers: 14,434,515
Past affiliation? Unknown.
Her associates should also be investigated before she is pronounced...GUILTY!
Ronda Rousey
Total social media followers: 14,308,9591
Past affiliation? Supported Sanders, and said she wouldn't vote for Hillary; current status unknown.
You can pronounce her GUILTY, Matt, but before you could finish that word, she would have you slammed down to the mat.
Kenny Chesney
Total social media followers: 9,051,699
Past affiliation? He says he doesn't like to talk politics, which he kinda didn't do in his new political manifesto.
I checked that manifest and he only sort of seems to not support Trump which means he is...GUILTY!
Cam Newton
Total social media followers: 2,892,859
Past affiliation? Unknown, he wouldn't talk about politics.
Absolutely...GUILTY!
Danica Patrick
Total social media followers: 2,958,805
Past affiliation? Stays away from politics.
Anybody associated with NASCAR is obviously...GUILTY!
Bruno Mars
Total social media followers: 84,661,423
Past affiliation? Unknown.
Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars so...GUILTY!
Phil Mickelson
Total social media followers: 91,300
Past affiliation? Has donated to the Republican party.
Donated to the Republican party? That plus just being a professional golfer make him...GUILTY! GUILTY! GUILTY!
Carrie Underwood
Total social media followers: 17,366,107
Past affiliation? Probably Republican, but "I prefer to stay away from politics."
Even just a bare hint of being a Republican makes her...GUILTY!
Mark Wahlberg
Total social media followers: 20,601,245
Past affiliation? Doesn't like to talk politics, but has golfed with Trump.
Just breathing the same air as Trump makes you...GUILTY!
The Rock
Total social media followers: 67,447,579
Past affiliation? Leans Republican, but hasn't endorsed Trump. Might run for president.
GUILTY! But do you really want to tell The Rock that to his face?
The condemned celebrities must now gather together to await sentencing by Lord Torquemada Miller.
